I have been working as Mike’s intern for almost a month now and it has been a great experience. There is never a dull moment, that’s for sure! Thank you to all those who have defended me, since I’ve already been Grrr’d a few times already. Anyway, here are your newest Grrrs. I hope you enjoy them… Katherine Sands, FOX News intern
Mark in Dallas, Texas, writes: Grrr to ABC and ESPN for some clearly biased reporting on the NBA Finals. Following games 1 and 2 (both double-digit Dallas victories), the post-game commentary revolved exclusively around how POORLY Shaq and Wade played and what they need to change to win. After Miami played about as well as they are capable of playing and eked out a 2-point win, the post-game commentary focused again solely on how Wade and Shaq played. This time it was about how WELL they played (even though Shaq was, amazingly, matched step-for-step by Erik “WNBA” Dampier). Again, no mention of Dallas at all. It’s like the Mavs aren’t even there. How about some credit for some great Mavs play? This must be what it’s like to be Goliath.
Erica in Florida writes: Hey Mike, love your column! Regarding this morning’s AP story, my Grrrr goes out to all the Katrina “victims” who blew their FEMA cards on Hawaiian vacations, porn, strippers, jewelry, football tickets, and who knows what else. While the government may have been a little slow on the upswing, the American people rallied to help you through one of the most difficult moments in our country’s history. Shame on those who took advantage of FEMA and the tax dollars of your fellow Americans! You are a disgrace to this country. To the true victims of Katrina, kudos for holding your heads high as you continue to rebuild. Our thoughts and prayers are with you as we begin another hurricane season.
A broken-hearted American in Cyberspace writes: On Wednesday, the House Homeland Security Committee will be holding a hearing on the FEMA debacle following Hurricane Katrina, specifically the “tens of millions of dollars” in waste that was given to victims through checks, EFTs and check cards. Yes, FEMA has some questions to answer — that issue has been beaten to death. But what Grrrs! me beyond belief are the people that knowingly abused the generosity of our government. A recent investigation found that in one case, 17 individuals, many with the same last name and addresses, used 34 different SSNs to bilk the government out of $103,000. People all over the country, from celebrities to single moms, coughed up millions in donations to help those affected, and yet millions of TAXPAYER dollars were stolen by unworthy individuals who then spent them on strip clubs, a sex change operation, expensive dinners, a Caribbean cruise and season tickets for a football game. These disgusting people trampled all over the generosity this country exuded after Katrina, and I hope the government rounds every single one of them up.
Jacob from Belleville, Ill., writes: Whereas I don’t have a problem with onions, I do appreciate your frustration with the ubiquitous onion. My gripe is very similar: why do restaurants (especially fast food ones) insist on adding mayonnaise to everything? And just like your concern over onions, mayonnaise is many times left off the menu, or else it is described as “sauce.” Please, people! If your sauce is mayonnaise with garlic, or mayonnaise with relish, or mayonnaise with whatever gourmet secret blend your overpaid test kitchens invented, please list the mayonnaise! And the onions.
Scott Stuart writes: Mike, you are so correct about restaurants listing EVERYTHING that’s in your order. I don’t like tomatoes and nothing is worse than when I order something and tomatoes appear. People don’t understand that the juice and seeds end up getting on everything, so it’s not just as easy as picking them off of whatever I order. If there are tomatoes (or onions) in your dish, please just list them and save you and I the time of sending them back.
Alan writes: Your comment about onions is funny. My wife also does not like onions all
over her food either. But most sauces use onion for flavoring, you just may not know it. Chunks are another issue. What I don’t like is the mass quantity of garlic that’s being used in everything. First of all it lights off my stomach, and who the heck wants to smell what you had for dinner for the next 12 hours?
Kristie in Arkansas writes: Hi Mike! Couldn’t resist responding to this one. Grrr to you, Kelly! Your grrr about an intern being responsible for picking out the grrrs is the silliest thing I have ever heard. Evidently you have never been an intern. I had two internships in college and both were very valuable to me. Why? Because I actually was exposed to work in the real world and not just asked to fetch coffee and make copies. Furthermore, I am sure that these grrrs are not simply chosen by the intern and posted without any “Straka supervision.” I applaud you, Mike, for allowing your interns to take on some real responsibility and make their internships worthwhile!
Vicki Shawin Connecticut writes: I have a huge GRRR to people like Ben Roethlisberger who don’t wear a helmet or other safety gear while riding their motorcycles. I ride on my commute to/from work (I can’t afford to keep filling my SUV each week) as well as for pleasure. No matter what the weather is like, I wear a helmet, gloves, jeans, boots and long-sleeved shirt. It’s taught in the Motorcycle Safety Foundation’s courses, which more people should be required to take — maybe it would stop these knuckleheads from doing dangerous and unsafe things that give safe riders a bad name. Maybe if Ben had been wearing a helmet instead of touting the fact that Pennsylvania’s helmet law was repealed, he wouldn’t be going through a 7-hour surgery to repair nose and jaw fractures. Think he’s learned his lesson? Probably not — we’ll hear about him riding without a helmet later this year or next riding season. Wise up, Big Ben, your life depends on it.
JR in Greenville writes: My GRR … is to airplane riders. What are you thinking? Don’t you know how dangerous planes are? You know if there is an accident, you don’t stand a chance, right? Young people who ride planes are totally irresponsible and deserve what they get, and don’t get me started on skiers … see how ridiculous that sounds? Yeah, well, leave Steeler Ben (too short of a life to spell that name) alone. I am tired of hearing how stupid he was, how this hopefully will be a lesson to everyone else, how selfish he is, how he has let his team down, how he “got what was coming to him” for not wearing a helmet while riding. Every decision in life has risks if it goes wrong. People, this man goes out in practice every day of the week and even more so on Sundays and risk every bone in his body, let alone his season/career, challenging physical freaks of nature who devote a significant amount of their time developing strategies to punish and hurt him. Hmm, isn’t that a bit dangerous? But you glorify him for it and talk about him being a warrior. Ask anyone about this young man’s decision-making — he has a solid head on his shoulders, although with the heart of a lion. That isn’t a show, folks. He doesn’t turn into a timid teddy bear when you turn off the TV. Riding a motorcycle, helmet or no, may be one of the sanest things that he does on a weekly basis. Would there be this same outcry if he got hurt while on a team charter somewhere? Lastly, people say that he should wait until he is finished playing to ride. What, do you mean when he is married with kids to support? I personally have a motorcycle now (26 years old) specifically because I won’t ride one when I am older and have a family that is my responsibility, not because I am immature or selfish. Ben also just has himself to look after and is a big boy who will now have to pay the price for his decision, so unless you are willing to match his punishment when he returns to the “safety” of the football field, get off his back.
PS. I will stand for no more harsh words for intern Katherine. She is doing a wonderful job!! If I have any problem with her, it is the numerous autograph seekers, paparazzi and groupies that have followed in the wake of her publication of my last Grrr!! But I gladly suffer through it all for my literature. (Keep up the good work, Katherine, and I will split the profits from my future web site MrGrr.com.)
M. Mitchell in Frankfort, Ky., writes in response to Adam in Colorado Springs: I guess I am too stuck in 1983 because I do not choose to use a debit or credit card. Did have a debit card once and after going shopping one day and paying 2-3 times at “several” stores for the same item, I decided they are not for me. Company tried to blame the cashiers swiping the cards, but when they did they were being told “error, try again.” Machine was really picking up all of the transactions. Took several phone calls and several days to straighten it out. So it is safer and a lot less stressful foe me to pay with cash. I guess I am old-fashioned too, since I learned math and accounting in high school years ago and have no problems with “managing or balancing” my account. Just hope Adam never runs into any of the problems I had, but to each his own. Not all things are good to all people in the 21st century, Adam.
Sheila in New York writes: Today I saw an absolutely filthy, faded American flag flying below a brand new Puerto Rican flag. I almost cried. On any given day you’ll see the colors of Puerto Rico, Mexico, the Dominican Republic, Jamaica and Trinidad flying in business and residential windows, on fire escapes and on the hoods, bumpers and back windows of cars. Will somebody please inform my Latino and Caribbean brothers and sisters that it’s a HUGE INSULT to fly the colors of another nation when our country is at war? It just galls me. That’s my grrrr.
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